Introspection – Clothes Make the Career Mindset

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A well organized closet is a double-edged sword.  – Elizabeth

I’ve had a lifelong love-hate relationship with closets.  

When I was very young I had to share a very small closet with a sibling.  Because it really was too small to be functional a lot of stuff ended up getting shoved under beds in the room we shared.  

More than a feng shui no-no it was a great way to lose small items like socks.

In my early teens I had a closet that was bare.

And I mean bare.  Not better times in life.

In that case I pushed everything to one side and kept the sliding door closed over the other so it didn’t seem quite as empty.

In high school it became a place to put not only clothes but posters and other visual aids that inspired creativity.

Paving the way for my novels to become reality.

Closet Normal.  

Once I was fully entrenched in corporate my closet found itself organized for the simple fact every piece in it had a purpose.

Since many suits and blouses were Christmas and birthday gifts it also served as incentive to smile every time I looked inside.  

It also reminded me of a brilliant colleague – who left corporate to become a full-time writer – who advised me on dressing for the job I wanted not the one I had. 

 Thank you MT!

Tweaks Thanks to Advice from Mom.  

I’d just moved back to the Midwest from Silicon Valley, my closet filled with a hodge podge of Caliornia stuff alongside suits.

Messy – like my state of mind at that point.

My mom told me of a TV show on which a guest who was a professional organizer explained that most people wear 20% of their outfits 80% of the time.  Armed with that I did the first major wardrobe purge of my life.

I’d always donated what I outgrew or no longer needed but taking a hard look at what I truly wore was something I hadn’t done before.

Career Identity – The Clothing Evolution

Life in Silicon Valley – corporate clothing wise – was always more casual than the Midwest.

My first day of work in Santa Clara I ran into a sales guy in shorts, tank top, flip flops and sunglasses.  When I asked if he was on vacation he laughed and explained he was on his way to Intel and that his attire was not only right it was what he would see at his customer as well.

Rather than get rid of perfectly good suits I swapped out the skirts and pants for jeans.  

Colleagues would often say “You can take the girl out of the Midwest…” in response to my formal attire.

Career Identity Trouble Brews

Though I left corporate to pursue writing full-time I kept all the beautiful suits.  Unfortunately, wearing them to work on a novel didn’t feel right.

Or comfortable.

Wearing jeans and a t-shirt, however, felt too casual and stymied my creativity.

I didn’t feel like I was working.

About a year and a half later I decided to donate my suits.

I wasn’t wearing them and seeing them in the closet was keeping me stuck between my old career and my new one.

Career Identity Trouble Intensifies.

This was the beginning of a years long wrestle with my career wardrobe as every time I looked in my closet I felt confused.

And inadequate.

No Goldilocks In Sight.

I vascillated between overly formal which killed my ability to be creative…

Stemming no doubt from being physically uncomfortable/feeling physically confined.

And feeling like a bum because I was dressed so casually…

Inhibiting my ability to take my writing career as seriously as I had my corporate one.

Changes Outside Inside

Aaron supported me as I tried multiple versions of wardrobe pieces, taking effort to explain that in the time since I left corporate, things had become even more casual in terms of work wardrobe.

What I remembered from when I was there was no longer en Vogue.

For all his support, my psyche was still caught in conflict.

Too formal V. Too casual.

Irony

Perhaps the biggest irony is this now being an issue for thousands thanks to the Work From Home wave brought on by the pandemic.

Changes Inside Outside

The Closet Speaks

I’ve come to see recently that my closet was always a reflection of where I was along life’s path.  In terms of my career I have been successful in having what I needed but only this weekend past did I see that I have what I wanted, a wardrobe that reflects who I am – career-wise. Specifically, I came to see my casual work wardrobe has evolved as I have.

Career wise.

Over the past 2 or so years I’ve worked in pajamas, jeans, and t-shirts associated with the various series.

I’ve also put on more formal tops if the Muse moved me.

Though I understand the more comfortable I am the more likely the words will flow, it’s how I see myself as the writer that should drive what I wear.

It’s Attitude not Clothes!

There was a time when wearing pajamas and working on the couch got me down because I felt I shouldn’t do it.  It didn’t matter that I was highly prolific.  My mind was stuck back in corporate thinking What would people think if they saw me?

Slacker anyone?

Over recent months as I’ve made changes on my website and to my project calendar I have further tweaked my wardrobe to better reflect the changes that were every bit as internal as external. 

The Weekend Breakthrough.

This weekend past I spent time in a closet that was already cleaned and organized to see what if anything was tied to the old writer me.  I then took any items I felt fit that bill and put them into a donate bag.  

The idea being let go of what no longer serves.

Though I know that I, like my career, am still evolving, at least I will be journeying with less baggage.

Fewer items holding me in a place I have not been in a long time.

Interestingly, the most important work was done before I went through the closet.

Internally.

I needed to come to peace with who I have become in the years since leaving corporate long before thinning the wardrobe.

Be well and journey light!

END OF YEAR TRADITIONS

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I wanted to take a moment this holiday week and let everyone know how thankful I am for my readers.

And visitors to this site!

I am also thankful not only to my team but to all of those at WordPress, Smashwords, and other organizations who make this all possible.

I hope everyone has a peaceful and happy Thanksgiving week.  

Update

I will be offline for a bit.

Though I may be inspired to write a post.

I continue to work on projects but will be using the coming weeks to do a bit of introspection and self-evaluation.

This end-of-year tradition is a significant part of career planning.  

After a hectic 13 months I consider this a well-deserved and much needed break.

I will post and/or provide updates as appropriate but for now…

Happy Holidays 2022!

WRITING A SERIES: MANIFESTING THE VISION

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Note: Excerpt at end of post.

Though I don’t have a release date I am well on my way with Blue Skye In the Rain, follow-up to Port In a Storm.

Thanks to work done prior to the pandemic.  

Working on material for the Port Gallatan series has been fun.  It’s also been challenging in that keeping the original vision through the twists and turns of the last 5 years has been a bit daunting.  In no specific order, here are a few of the challenges

Working Title.  Just prior to moving to the current location I mentioned to a casual if somewhat regular acquaintance that I was working on a novel with the working title Blue Skye.  I gave him a brief synopsis and he replied with a smile and a promise to periodically check in to see how things were coming along on the story.  

That was 3 years ago!

Shortly after moving I started the story, then set it aside.

This is typical when I’m finishing one book but want to keep up momentum for the next project.

Off Course.  We’d barely finished unpacking when we were staring down the chaos of a pandemic lockdown and while this turned into one of the more prolific periods of my writing career, it steered me far away from the vision I had for the series.

Switched Gears.  Toward the end of 2021 I turned my focus to a number of nonfiction projects.

Eventually, it was time to swing back around to the story.  And yet…

Which One?

When I plan a series I generally have a good idea how many novels will be in its borders.  Unfortunately, with the Port Gallatan work, I had three different novels that could have followed Port In a Storm.  What I didn’t realize initially is that not all of them were suited to the vision I had for the series.

I was so ready to get back to fiction writing I overlooked that little detail.

I was well down the path of Hollow Shelter when it hit me.

This isn’t going to work!

Dropping the book I took time to regroup.

Figure out where I went off the path.

The process took longer than I anticipated and was filled with a great deal of angst as I tried to figure out where I went wrong and what the best path forward might be.

And which book I should work on next!

Thinking it might be helpful to step away for awhile, I considered doing the next Dragon Core book.

Eventually decided against it.

I considered reworking Hollow Shelter – even started to – then realized that wasn’t the best one for next in the series.  

Finally, I determined Blue Skye was the best one, not the least reason of which is that it beautifully sets up for the next 2 in the series.

It’s also based on a comedic theme, something I think everyone can use these days.

Trouble was, Blue Skye was only a place holder title, what those in the industry call a working title.  Sure enough, I spent several days struggling to come up with an alternate.  Unfortunately, there was a plot device that went with Blue Skye and I knew if I switched out the title I would lose that.

That plot device is a big part of the story.

Aaron and I were out driving recently and I began talking through the challenge of the working title.  Without even thinking, I added “In the rain.”  When I mentioned it being a follow on to Port In a Storm, I smiled.  I had my tie-in!

Details like that are very important to me!

Inertia from being away from fiction had set in.

Little details like working titles don’t get the novel written.

I spent yesterday building out the setup for the story, managing to get in some write time.  

Stuff like organizing files and directories, building a playlist that suits the story.

After a good night’s sleep I am back at it.

Release date will be announced in the coming months.

The following is an excerpt from the upcoming book.

PROLOGUE

Construction Site, Montana

Spring, 2021

“Blue Skye In the Rain?  What kind of a name is that for a business?”

Knowing it would irritate his father, twenty-eight-year-old Ryan Skye took a moment before replying to lean over so he could use his t-shirt to wipe his sweaty forehead.  Oh, and count to ten.  Twice. 

Standing slowly he noted a number of the crew – those not used to the periodic and somewhat regular squabbles between father and son – had stopped what they were doing to watch.  Lips in a half-smile half-smirk, he looked into the eyes of the man who taught him everything he knew about running a business through good times and bad, who taught him to be independent, whose wife his mother encouraged him to follow his dreams.  Shrugging, he replied,  “Guess you’ll just have to come out and see for yourself.”  

Ignoring the snickers of nearby crew- and his father’s look of disgust – he hefted a bag of mix and made for the cement truck. 

CJAPTER ONE

Port Gallatan

Summer, 2021

The tiny town of Port Gallatan – a town some say is at the edge of nowhere – has had an identity crisis of one sort or another since being founded by eccentric French Noble Jamet Gallatan.  In search of privacy he made sure the small hamlet on the water earned a reputation for being unfriendly to strangers, including those just passing through.  But like the human desire to direct destiny, progress cannot be controlled and soon, others in search of freedom to pursue dreams joined the reclusive Frenchman.  

Those who settled in the small village, who knew Jamet, respected his right to seclusion, opined he should have known that in settling on a port he would be part of the progress he claimed to eschew.  And so it was that the small town, like the fledgling country it was a part of, grew.

For a period following the US industrial revolution, there was belief the town – thanks to the new railroad being built in the West – would grow.  Thrive even.  Speculators from near and far flocked to the tiny port village to lay claim to a piece of history and for a time Port Gallatan burst at the seams.  But it was not to be.  The railway bypassed the little village by the water, sealing its fate as a small town caught between progress and stagnation.  

MANIFESTING: A LOT HAS TO HAPPEN

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It’s been a busy two weeks as I’ve cleared out the old to make way for the new.

All part of the process of manifesting a goal.

As I was getting ready for bed last night I came to understand that some goals take longer than expected because a lot has to happen first.

For instance

In a previous post I wrote of being 13 and thinking while watching a movie that it would be cool to live in a certain type of house in a certain type of neighborhood featured in the movie.  At the time my family was in no position to achieve it and in any case, my vision wasn’t that of my parents.  Needless to say, a lot had to happen between then and now for me to attain that goal.

I lived in a lot of places between then and now and went through a number of life changes along the path to the goal.

It’s no different when looking to achieve a career goal.

For example

There came a time where I decided I wanted to be a technical consultant.  In spite of having taken programming in college and using a computer since I was a teen, I didn’t have the skills when I made the decision.

A lot had to happen.

I spent the next years immersed in classes and activities that filled in skill gaps.

A Wrench

Though an agreement had been in place at my place of employment that once I met a set of criteria I would be promoted, when I met the requirements, the company was in a downturn and there was no headcount.

The Universe Steps In

On the other side of the world

Germany, to be exact

A woman fell in love with a US citizen who happened to be working for the same company I was.  They decided whoever got a job in the other’s country first would move.  As it turned out the American who was a TC in Silicon Valley was the one to make the move.  

Lucky me.

There is a great deal of kismet to this manifestation but suffice it to say that the Universe had bigger plans for me.  Instead of getting a promotion where I worked – one that didn’t come with a raise – I got a bigger promotion and a significant raise.

And a cost of living adjustment.

Pivot

I eventually left corporate to focus on a lifelong goal of being a novelist.

Another Wrench

Thanks to an interesting set of circumstances, I ended up publishing nonfiction first.

The Universe Steps In

In the years since publishing Riding the Waves: Diagnosing, Treating, and Living with EMF Sensitivity, I’ve experienced a number of life changing events, each of which has nudged me – by hook or by crook – along the path of my career goals.  What I’ve come to see in recent weeks is that the path is not only long it’s often like a switchback trail where you sometimes wonder if you’re even going in the right direction let alone have a hope in hell of getting where you are headed.

There is a beautiful 11 mile trail in Sedona that left Aaron and I both wondering this at times.

I think he has video of me with needles from a friendly prickly pear sticking out of my shirt in several places from when I took a wrong turn and got off the path.

Path To a Series

Port Gallatan has simultaneously been fun and infuriating as I’ve tried to build out my vision for the series.

Other work and life in general kept throwing wrenches.

The Universe Steps In

I was so busy working at the macro level of the career goals I didn’t notice that the actions I was taking were in fact clearing a number of obstacles from the Port Gallatan path!

I am happy to say Blue Skye in the Rain, follow-up to Port In a Storm is well on its way to completion.

Availability date to be announced soon.

I’ll take a moment to wish everyone a Happy Holloween!

Closing with a joke I read in an email this morning.

What did Dracula say when the witch and the werewolf started kissing?

Get a broom!

Be well!

MANIFESTING: LET THE DUST SETTLE

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The previous two weeks have been Feng Shui on steroids as I cleared out the old to make way for the new and boy did I feel it!

I was removing colorful candles set on a mirror and got  an energetic shock.  Highly unpleasant.

The process was a bit like pulling the thread on a sweater and while I had a super hero friend advise that I may not want to pull on that thread, I knew delaying it wasn’t going to make it any easier.

Sometimes it’s better to rip the band-aid off quickly than slowly peeling that adhesive.

Though I’ve had lots of experience with the benefits of clearing and organizing I was surprised to find that sometimes things doing the most damage are not in plain sight!  Deciding to leave no stone unturned in my efforts to realize a special goal, I rifled through drawers and opened cabinets, separating into a toss or donate pile.  The process took a few days and the evening of the day where the troublesome objects hidden from sight were gone – mostly in the trash – I felt wonderful.

As if the weight of the world had been lifted.

The next day Aaron and I took everything in the trunk to the donate location and went to a local trash and recycle center to get rid of the rest.  Strangely enough though I felt wonderful on an intellectual level, I no longer had that awesome feeling physically.

It wasn’t regrets, it was the fact that I’d basically yanked the energetic tablecloth off and things had to settle, and yes, some of the stuff went crashing to the floor.  But it had to.

Letting Go.

I’ve never been much for sentimentality.

Probably comes from having lived with a pack rat of a father and/or listening to various  relatives lament “But I might use/need it some day!”

It also comes from being raised in a family, faith, and community that was big on supporting those less fortunate.

We would sponsor a family and buy them either a Thanskgiving or Christmas dinner.  My brother and I went with our parents to deliver so we could understand the love and value of giving.

It isn’t always objects that need to be let go of.  There are times when we outgrow a location, a relationship, a job, or any other number of energetically impactful situations and while some are easier to let go of than others, most of us don’t take the time after to let the energetic dust settle.

We may freak out at the empty shelves or drawers or cupboards and buy more “stuff” to fill them.

In my current situation since it’s a career goal I’m working toward I needed to see where in that area I needed to let go.

Some future projects were axed.

What I found very telling was that I didn’t feel the slightest bit of panic in taking actions that backed up the intention of realizing the goal.

It’s important to clear out what no longer serves to make space for what you wish to come in.

I also didn’t feel an energetic high.  It was more a solid inner conviction that I’d done the right thing.

A Funny Thing.

Interestingly, I discovered that just as with those items hidden from sight there were career related items and situations that had become a dark cloud over my life – and I didn’t even know it until they were gone.

This includes files not only on the computer but in various backup locations!

I spent a good deal of yesterday deleting old files.

Space Freed Up!

Though I’m not one to go looking for stuff to fill empty shelves, I do have a tendency to jump into the next project as soon as one is finished.

Which is how I got so burned out to begin with.

Recognizing the need to let the energetic dust settle I considered where else dark clouds may be lurking out of sight.  

Next Stop?  Kindle!

I generally keep my Kindle library pretty lean and mean with majority of the ebooks in there fiction rereads from my favorite authors.  However, sprinkled in were a few books on various aspects of manifesting and/or otherwise improving your life and while these books are generally upbeat something told me it was time to let them go.  The only ones I raised my eyebrows with were purchases made very recently.

As in “I just got these!”

In one case I hadn’t even finished the book!

And I was enjoying it!

At the same time, I felt as if God was whispering the words “Trust me” into my soul so I went ahead and let go.

Deciding it wouldn’t hurt to add a few more read-for-pure-pleasure books into my library I went to Amazon and while I did find a couple of rereads to add to my collection, I also found an intriguing book along the same subject of the ones I’d just deleted.  I downloaded a sample.

I hadn’t even read four pages when I knew I needed to read the entire book.  What jumped out was the author pointing out that before we can manifest goals, we need to let go of what may be hindering our efforts.

Exactly what I’ve been working on for the previous 2 weeks!

After reading a few more pages this morning I was convinced following that guidance was the right thing. 

But Wait!  There’s More!

While I don’t see meaning in every shooting star I do acknowledge the beautiful synchronicities the Universe puts in my path.  More, I acknowledge them and thank God and his angels, including earth angels, for reminding me I’m not alone in my efforts.  This time was no different.

What stood out was that the author’s words mirrored my thoughts and the material came just when I needed it.  

Acknowledging the good fortune of finding a book that would help me in this stage of the journey toward realizing my goal I went to my desk and started working.  Content the day would unfold as it needed to I didn’t immediately start a specific task.

Such as a blog post I knew I would eventually write – when the time was right and I had my thoughts collected.

No sooner had I made that decision – to remain relaxed and wait for the words – when I found myself looking at an article that addressed something that has been on my mind in tandem with my efforts.  My immediate thought?  Of course.

Because I acknowledged the gift of the book, I was given another gift and upon sending a quick thank you and reading through that gift [article] I got insight into why I was advised to let go of those other books on the same subject.

Now Hear This!  

As a clairaudient who is also a clairsentient I sometimes have trouble figuring which came first, hearing something or knowing/feeling it.  What I do know is that the answer came in both forms fairly simultaneously.

“That author was overly complicating things.”

That was the first message.  When I thought on it a bit I nodded and acknowledged the insight after which I heard, “And besides, you’ve been doing just fine doing the inner work your way.”

It was then pointed out that I’d been studying the subject for decades.

Going all the way back to when I would ask nuns and priests about praying and asking for help for material goods.

The more I thought about the two revelations the more it made sense.  There was nothing wrong with those other books.  They were just overly complicating what is actually a pretty straight-forward process.

Perhaps more important, however, was acknowledging my own skill in this area.

Reading the step-by-step instructions wouldn’t be a good use of time for someone who could teach a class on it.

If that makes a few readers raise their eyebrows as in “If you could teach it why do you need to …?”

Everyone including teachers have lessons in life to learn.

The book I purchased last night is written in a way that speaks to me at this stage of my life and for that I am grateful it came into my sphere of awareness.  

As for everything else I’ve been doing.  I have a few tasks left in terms of letting go but of more value is the knowledge and acceptance that I need to let the energetic dust settle before moving forward.

As I’ve been writing – when it comes to manifesting dreams, it’s a process.

Be well!

MANIFESTING: SURPRISES ALONG THE WAY

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Note: Longer post.

Deciding on a goal to manifest really can be a bit of a chicken or the egg” proposition.  That’s because sometimes a need drives the decision to make a change and you may not have realized on a conscious level the need existed.

Your higher conscious knows something has to change but it may take awhile to get from your heart to your head.

Several months ago I wrote about setting a few career goals   Turns out the path I set myself on to realizing those goals is nothing like what I imagined.

Little did I know what I was in for.

Having manifested a number of goals throughout my adult life I set down the path with some pre-conceived ideas of how to go about things.  This included visualization, and writing down what it was I wanted.

Ala Write It Down, Make It Happen and It Works style.

I have come to see the benefit of the first is learning there is no wrong way to go about writing your goals.  The benefit of the second is that frequently looking at a list of goals helps you stay focused on tasks in support of the goals.  

Turns out I had a lot of inner work to do before I could get where I was headed.  The changes and tweaks I made along the path of that inner work was not only exhausting, it was confusing.

When you are in the midst of turning the boat around and waves are coming over the side from the storm it can feel like you are making no progress except heading for a shipwreck.

More than once I felt despair because of the chaos in my life; chaos I felt was keeping me from working toward my goal.

The chaos had nothing to do with my career goals!

It was only in recent weeks that I came to see the chaos was part of the process.  It forced me to address various issues that would have come back to cause problems if not addressed up front.

In other words, if I didn’t address the situation ahead of time it would stand in the way of my attaining and/or maintaining goal success.

How Did I Get Here?

It was as I was putting the final touches on a few projects related to the goal that I came to see a number of seeming coincidences led to the clearing of several impediments.  I believe the coincidences came because I put sincere intent into the goal and the universe noticed.

I was at a point where I felt as if I’d been dragged through the mud but rather than throw my hands up I doubled down and looked for a way forward, finding it in a very cool book.

Royce’s book was a shot of optimism and helped me reframe the previous months’ chaos as part of the process.  Feeling better I reached out to a wise friend across the country and in so doing set the stage for the next part of the journey.

I was just wishing her a happy birthday but the subsequent back and forth led to several mini victories.

As a result of several email exchanges I looked at my life through a variety of lenses and saw that a few things needed tweaking.  As these tweaks had nothing to do with my career goals I didn’t put it together they, too, were part of the process.  Until…

Making the feng shui tweaks – originally set to address the non-career goal issues that needed addressing – led to my seeing where I’d gone wrong with the tweaks in the career area.  Next thing I know I’ve made a series of sweeping changes that showed me the path to the career goals includes taking care of business as my dad is wont to say in every area that needs to be healthy in order to support the career goals.

Physical, mental, and emotional well-being among others.

What really stood out in the previous few days was how little angst there was with the changes I needed to make.  I think my head finally caught up to the truth that if I allow my heart to lead I’ll get down the path with a lot fewer bumps.

A Thumbs Up

From the universe.

This morning I started a new routine to start off this new phase of the journey and though I felt confident, I also felt a bit worn out.

I’ve done an incredible amount of mental and emotional housecleaning in the past two weeks.

Barista Boo Boo

As if in a show of universal support for my commitment, an error at the local Starbucks netted me two extra dopios.  Accepting the gift I continued down the path of manifesting, smiling because even chaos can be a happy surprise that marks progress.  You just have to let yourself see it that way.

Be well!