After months of effort I’ve determined there is no value in doing Podcast 4.
I can’t make it work.
I have a number of projects in the works. For now?
Be well.
Update: Podcast No Go
Miss Manners: Lessons Worth Learning
Sitting with a scented candle the cozy colors of autumn’s splendor visible through the window and thinking on recent interactions with a gentleman I would describe as having Old World Manners. Doubtless I’m aging myself with that phrase but as I let my mind wander, couldn’t help but acknowledge with pride I raised my kids with those same manners. Though it may seem an outdated and perhaps unnecessary skill for parents to teach, not doing so can cost kids success.
Because you never know.
The Dinner Setting
My paternal grandmother saw brilliance in the man she wanted to marry, a WW II Air Force Captain. She enrolled in finishing school, went on to be the wife of a powerful CEO. This woman taught me a wide range of skills – how to entertain the 1% including how to set a place setting for a full-course European meal. The irony? I was living in poverty thanks to her son.
When was I ever going to…?
Lessons Worth Learning
I once asked her, given my socio-economic realities – why waste time and energy? Her answer?
You Never Know When
My grandmother was investing on my behalf.
Learn Well
I had good reason to listen to her advice even as I acknowledged she was a bit bats in the belfry.
The mansion behind their property literally had a belfry even as I went without food, clothes that fit… power shut off in winter due to lack of paying the bills.
But…
I had dreams.
From the time I was 6 I talked of traveling the world and being something more though I kept those dreams a secret in my heart.
A lot of her persuasion revolved around painting a vision of a time I lifted myself out of poverty and these lessons would come in handy.
She should have been an actress. She was brilliant painting a time when…
She made me believe.
12 Years Later
10 – 15 years younger than my tech peers I nonetheless helped secure a huge win that put my district on the global map. As such I was included in the award – a weekend stay at a 5-star hotel and a stipend for a nice dinner.
I worked 80 hours a week several weeks in a row alongside peers on a customer opportunity that brought in hundreds of millions of dollars.
Single I reached out to a high school buddy to go with me.
His parents grilled me for over an hour on details.
Ah Details
I chose a nice steakhouse away from restaurants where I’d likely run into my colleagues. To my surprise my buddy started asking if his tie was crooked, if he’d placed the silverware correctly…
I assured him the wait staff had taken care of it.
It got to a point where he admitted he was terrified of shaming me at the upcoming award banquet.
Needless to say I assured him there was nothing to worry about.
As the youngest recipient of the award I was equally nervous but I’d worked my tail off.
Doing The Right Thing
I’ve raised my kids with Old World Manners not with the idea I’m trying to shape them into world leaders but because it’s the right thing to do. Smiling? Treating People with respect? Wishing them a good day? Lifting them up when they need a helping hand? THESE are the pillars upon which decent society was built and in spite of what you may read on the web it’s the fabric that still exists.
Across the globe.
Pass the baton of good manners…
If you didn’t have the opportunity to learn at home there are plenty of books on etiquette so take advantage of your local library and dream your future.
Be Well
From There to Here: The Journey
The journey to pursue my dream of being a writer is nothing like I envisioned when I left corporate in 2003.
3 months after being awarded a doctorate in holistic health.
I certainly never thought I’d come face to face with EMF Sensitivity which sent my vision on a serious detour.
From fiction writing.
While I’m the proud author of a number of fiction works nonfiction continues to take a significant place in my work and my life.
I have a passion for drawing on knowledge and experience to help others.
And then there’s the apps.
Though I spent decades in tech with programming experience in multiple languages it had been years since I’d done any programming.
Aaron to the Rescue!
My husband who supported my dreams from when I shared them on our first date and who’s been my partner in the madness of leaving safety to follow a dream offered to write the code if I gave him the content and the intent.
I’m proud of my work as all of it has been created with a passion for helping others.
Fiction is a wonderful way to explore a world you never knew existed and to take your mind off your troubles.
I can add that I’m hard at work on Podcast 4: Dealing with stressful and toxic environments holistically.
The Power of a Hug
Listening to The Gift from Gary Numan’s Intruder album and reflecting on the power of a hug.
Healing power.
As I Am Screaming starts up I recall a time when I was walking in downtown San Diego and a “hobo” (dated term I know) stepped in my path – not too close – and said with a smile – and arms open wide – “There’s someone who needs a hug.” And oh did I need one at that moment.
I was caught up in EMF Sensitivity Hell.
Smiling and trying not to cry I walked straight into his embrace and accepted all the love he was willing to give.
More Recently
Months back while at a working lunch I looked up to see a man looking as if he was about to fall apart.
He was sandwiched between high schoolers in line for pizza or bread sticks/salad for lunch before running back to school.
I mouthed “Are you okay?” Without saying a word he shook his head side to side. I immediately stood and went to him thinking to hug him.
I Froze
I asked if it was okay if I hugged him.
He nodded, said nothing – looked close to crumpling.
I pulled him into a hug and said “It’s going to be okay. I promise. It’s going to be okay. You’re going to be okay.”
He nodded on my shoulder – held me tight – shoulders shaking as he silently cried and said nothing.
No words were needed.
At some point I went back to my lunch – felt a bit embarrassed at the idea all these high school boys waiting for pizza saw such a display of emotion.
Long Ago
Pontiac Eats And Beats
I ran into a former coworker while Aaron and I attended the festival. I threw my arms around him.
We’re survivors of a toxic work environment from hell.
He held me so tight – stepped back and said “You have the best hug.”
Life
Interpretation.
I’ll leave it to readers to decide what the energy of a hug means but I’ll leave you with this. Months ago a friend told me Psychedlic Furs were touring. She knows how passionate I am about music – thought attending would bring me joy.
She also knows how much I love the opener – Gary Numan – which I’m listening to as I type this one-handed.
Doo-doo happens
Recently.
Slipped – put my left hand out reflexively – broke my arm.
Bummer man.
I can’t begin to express the mental/emotional toll this – in spite of lack of pain – no need for pain meds – has taken on me.
We met up with the friend who told me about the concert. After hugging me gently she smiled pointed and said “That was me at the Cure” and in that moment healed a part of me that though isn’t physical is nonetheless broken because of what at the end of the day is an accident.
People? Hugs heal.
Hugs convey love freely given.
Never doubt the power of love.
To heal.
Be well.
Manifesting 101: Gifts From the Universe
Listening to Love Walks in by Van Hagar and trying to absorb the sliding doors that had to open and close – the subway cars that had to pull in and out of the station to facilitate the soul healing incidents of the weekend.
Yesterday morning I woke my daughter up to tie my shoes so I could walk to Safeway to get a bouquet of flowers I would deliver to the firehouse as a token of my appreciation.
The service they did for me? I’d only been out of Urgent Care some 35 minutes. Not in a great mental place.
On my way my laces came undone. Not wanting to trip I stopped in at Starbucks and feeling humiliated – I couldn’t tie my own shoes – asked a sweet woman half my age running crazy for the morning crowd if she could tie my laces.
I felt – pretty awful. Embarrassed. I promised after getting flowers from grocery across the parking lot I was coming back to have coffee.
And get a treat for my daughter – just to be nice – not as a price for tying my shoes – how I felt about the barista.
This wonderful woman double-knotted my laces.
Ginsu Moment.
Showing my age I know.
I selected a beautiful bouquet I was going to put in a backpack I’d pull over a shoulder.
Sling keeping the other busy.
I approached two ladies to help me put the flowers in a plastic sleeve so they wouldn’t drip into my backpack.
I was going to tuck a sweet in as a treat for my daughter. Soggy? No good. Explaining this mess to the kind woman who took time out of her busy morning to help me? Forget it.
No Way!
One of the women laughed and said “Two peas in a pod!”
The woman who helped me with the flowers? She had the same type splint on her left forearm!
She’d fallen off a ladder and broke her arm in the same place!
Fast forward and dear daughter and I are walking to the door at the fire station only to see a sign for business hours.
Sunday isn’t one of those days.
There WAS a sign that pointed to an old-fashioned doorbell “Press here for service.”
And another that read if an emergency dial 911. Delivering flowers to say thank you? Um. No.
It was a great feeling handing over the bouquet and thanking the men and women who’d heard about my adventure.
As to Synchronicity?
I was told it was lucky timing. Apparently the crew had just closed out a call that enabled them to go to Starbucks for some java.
And help someone they had no idea was waiting for them.
Be well.
Irony and Angels Update
I wrote about the kismet of having firemen walk into a Starbucks right when I needed them. To show my appreciation I took a bouquet of flowers to the fire station where I learned of another piece of synchronicity to this story. Turns out they’d just closed out a call so had time for some java.
Timing like perspective is everything.
Manifesting 101: Irony and Angels
To say it’s been an interesting morning is an understatement.
It all started last night.
The Irony
Aaron and I were winding the week down and chatting in the living room. I told him how the Pilates and Hollow Holds were definitely making a difference strengthening my core muscles and how all the walking I’ve done the past 2 years has improved my balance and coordination.
Important after falling off a diving board and having a brain bleed at 10 left me paralyzed on the left side and balance challenged.
We decided to do pizza for dinner. As he was coming in from the garage a half hour later I got up and ran to the kitchen to meet him and the pizza.
And slipped on the kitchen floor. Yeah real coordinated.
I reflexively put out my left hand – behind me – taking the brunt of the fall on my left forearm. Because it didn’t hurt too badly I decided to sleep on it and see how it was in the morning. It wasn’t worse in terms of pain but it was pretty swollen so I decided to have it checked out.
Rats
My left forearm is broken.
More Irony and then Angels
Before they let me go the doctor asked me to remove my wedding and engagent rings when I got home.
She worried if there was swelling it might interfere with circulation to my fingers.
I explained that might be a problem. I’ve recently begun taking creatine so a bit of fluid retention. I told her I would try a bit of soap to try to slide them off. She was very concerned and asked that if that didn’t work I go to the fire department because they have tricks for getting rings off swollen fingers. Promising I would I went to the pharmacy I normally go to to have a prescription filled.
They were closed and there was no sign displaying when they would be open.
There are 3 pharmacies within close distance so I went to a different one.
They weren’t going to be open til 10am which was 20 minutes later.
Angels
I decided to treat myself to Starbucks. I’d just taken a bite of a croissant when a group walked in. I looked up to see from their shirts they were firemen!
Even with all the synchronicities I’ve experiened throughout my life I was amazed.
Thank you universe!
I approached one of them and explained the situation, asked if he could help me out. He smiled said he wanted to talk to his partner and asked if I’d heard of the dental floss trick for getting a ring off swollen fingers.
Nope.
They checked their gear – no floss.
They also tried a lubricant – no dice.
I went to the 3rd pharmacy to get dental floss while they waited at the seating area outside Starbucks.
A Rite-Aid.
Having recently declared bankruptcy the shelves were bare. No dental floss.
Back to the original store which is a grocery with a pharmacy inside.
Comedy of Errors
I ended up in line behind two people with completely full shopping carts, with one of the two buying several pumpkins and gourds, all of which had to be weighed. Me? Only the dental floss.
I’m no good with self checkout. It truly is comical.
Picturing the firemen waiting while I’m gone longer than a walk across the parking lot should have taken wasn’t as stress free as it might have been.
As a good friend points out from time to time Pat (patience) and I don’t necessarily get on well.
They were great – amazed the pharmacy across the parking lot didn’t have floss – and set to work getting the rings off.
During which I related the series of events that led to us being in the right place at the right time.
Success!
After a morning of adventure I’m home typing this story. Still amazed I’m also grateful the nuns forced me to be right-handed when I was born a southpaw.
Have an awesome day!
Be well
Dreams Take Decades
Just released an upcoming app to a beta tester** – listening to tunes to chill.
Separate Ways by Journey.
Glanced over to see the cover of a Metatron’s Army series notebook.
I was 16 when this series born of interesting creative life circumstances appeared in my mind’s eye.
The visual download was overwhelming.
The universe. I drew it in pencil on typing paper I stuck to my bedroom wall.
Using toothpaste because we were renting and tape would pull paint off. We’d be ding’d by the landlord.
Fast forward decades to publishing a story that lived in my soul for over 3 decades. I decided having a visual cue would help so turned to a member of my team.
Um.
He proceded to tell me everything wrong with my drawing.
The “star” was too close to certain planets and the aspect ratio of the system was way off.
We had a discussion during which I listened and respected his expertise even as my heart pounded off my chest.
I was in the process of releasing a story to the world no words could do justice to.
The Expert.
It was evident he wanted a happy customer.
I had to accept he had a handle on this I didn’t.
I told him to do as he saw fit.
That Notebook?
When I first saw it? I got tears in my eyes. My chest felt tight.
He somehow managed to design an image that filled a gaping hole in my soul.
Never stop believing in your dreams.
They never stop believing in you.
** App is for those dealing with Esoteric EMFs.
Responsibility: Who’s Is It?
Listening to Rag N Bone Man’s Skin
Powerful lyrics
My mind drifted to the people we believe we have responsibility to.
And how we ended up with these beliefs since we weren’t born with them.
Functional Dysfunction
Having lived the definition of growing up in a dysfunctional family it’s probably no shocker I might have an interesting definition if not perspective of who is responsible for who and what.
And how dysfunctiontals don’t miss an opportunity to put their responsibilities on others including and especially those too young and inexperienced and therefore totally unprepared to bear it.
Note: The stories I share in my podcasts? Trust me they’re stirring up memories that would be all too happy to stay dead and buried – but that wouldn’t help the world and those in it.
Nor would it honor those who gave me their trust and protection throughout the years.
Needless to say it’s taking a toll on me.
Choice
This isn’t the forum for going deep but I’m listening to this song and thinking of a man who made the choice to be a guiding light to someone; a man not much older who somehow surmised I’d missed out on a lot of important life lessons. Dealing with life himself? And adversity? He stepped out of the rushing stream of life that was sweeping souls to the open ocean where … well you can imagine … to give me a fighting chance at survival.
He saw I was shark bait.
He risked his career and much more to be there for me not because he was born with a responsibility to me but because he chose to help someone take the next step.
As life would have it I’ve been gifted along the convoluted way to cross paths with people who likewise chose a responsibility to help me to the next step.
Including my beloved husband Aaron.
There are no words to express the depth of my gratitude to these souls but along the path of responsibility to my fellow man? I learned the importance and impact of something as simple as a smile or a hug.
And how it can transform someone’s life – like the lyrics of a song.
Be in the flow.
And enjoy the music of life.
Be well.
Life: 52 Pickup
Note: This will be short and to the point.
Listening to More Than a Feeling by Boston.
Followed by Peace of Mind – another goodie.
About an hour ago I high-tailed it along my walk route to meet up with a couple who had a beloved doggie that got out. I saw her a few mornings back and a mutual acquaintance put us in touch to let them know.
I met them at the location I saw her.
As Fate Would Have It…
Story of my Celtic life.
A young man taking a break from work chatted with me as I was going then coming. Sitting here I was thinking of our convesation which led me to consider the ins and outs of life. A curiosity popped to mind.
The Hand Life Deals You.
As in cards…
I hate this saying that was shoved in my face during my corporate years any time I expressed frustration.
By colleagues 10 – 15 years older though not necessarily wiser.
I suppose it’s a philosophical take on shit happens.
What They Missed.
Probably too busy trying to survive the same corporte morass.
Life doesn’t deal you a hand of cards like a poker game. It tosses the damn deck and walks out without staying to watch you pick up the chaos.
Life happens.
Platitudes don’t.
We need to start giving ourselves credit where credit is due.
Be well
Elizabeth Maxim 