I recently wrote about the value of good manners.
Smiling? Treating People with respect? Wishing them a good day? Lifting them up when they need a helping hand? THESE are the pillars upon which decent society was built and in spite of what you may read on the web it’s the fabric that still exists.
The irony in that paragraph? By taking your cue from technology – what you read on the web – as opposed to a fellow human you end up with a skewed image of the world. Allowing someone you’ve never met tell you how to think and feel about what may or may not be reality can and does cause harm in the form of mental and emotional stress. It’s this truth that has driven communities across the globe to ban cell phones in classrooms and for kids under a certain age.
The Power of Human Connection
A powerful antidote is engaging with the people in your community, people who can help you determine whether what you read online is something you need to worry about. I’ll share an example.
Months back I was at a local pizza place.
Arriving shortly after they opened.
I love the energy of this place.
Lots of windows to let in natural light, very cool tunes selected by the even cooler staff who know me for my periodic working lunches.
Because of my timing I’m there when teens on their lunch break form a line to the door.
A line that goes by the table where I like to sit.
I’m always amazed by how polite the mostly male students are, talking and laughing quietly while they wait for their turn to order.
How nice they are to the staff.
Obviously, they were taught manners.
One afternoon I looked up to see a man in an army jacket in the middle of the pack. There were ribbons on his jacket reflecting service though it was evident he was no longer active. What struck me was his expression. The guy was in serious distress.
Are You Okay?
I mouthed the question to which, looking as if he was about to crumble, he shook his head. I went to him, my intention to hug him and help him feel okay.
After asking his permission that’s what I did.
I had a pretty good idea what was upsetting him. The web was filled with headlines about the growing political divide and thanks to various media platforms it was all too easy to feel as if you would be the victim of malice by people you’ve never met and who don’t know you.
Keenly aware of the teens close by I dropped my voice and asked if he was upset about recent events which weren’t favorable to the men and women who serve our country. He nodded put his head on my shoulder and cried silently while I held him.
Keeping his voice low he told me how proud he was to have served his country, how his parents raised him with good values.
Treating people with respect was high on that list.
I stepped back so I could look him in the eye, took his hands and said, “What you read is not reflective of your community. The people here do not feel that way. You are safe here. Hear me? You are safe.”
He sniffled but nodded and we chatted a few minutes more even as the line moved. I gave him another hug, promised him it was going to be okay, then went back to my salad and my work.
I wrote about that day and there’s a very good reason I’m repeating it here.
There’s An App For That
Despite how often those in the tech industry are vilified many continually strive to make the world a better place.
To help people live healthier happier lives.
To that end a dynamic duo recently released an app to help people break addiction to screen time, the goal being to help them reconnect with their community so they can absorb the love and friendship of those in it.
As a holistic healer I have been an enthusiastic supporter of this effort from the beginning.
I am proud to promote NoPhone: A Digital Detox app.
Feedback Welcome
I would love to hear feedback on this subject so feel free to comment.
Before I sign off I’d like to wish you peace and joy in your home and your community.
Be well!
Elizabeth Maxim 